I am finally, finally sitting here with children in bed, ready to process thoughts, after 6 long weeks of nausea, occasional throwing up, and being fatigued like nobodies business. It's been a long mountain to come 'round, but you can see my chariot pulling along...
Today marks the 12 week, good bye First Trimester, hello Second Trimester, finally feeling decent phase! I am owning and praying and hoping the previous statement. I hope to actually be churning out some decent material in the coming weeks. Sorry for the lack of blogging- my hubby was getting on me about it even- but between him working nights, traveling cross country for my grandmother's memorial service, chasing two kids under six years old, and being PREGNANT (hello!) I have been, say, slightly busy at times. I plan on putting up pregnancy updates like I did during Levi's pregnancy, but tonight will include a little of everything and answering questions that people have been raising to me quite frequently over the last two months since we announced a pumpkin coming to the patch.
Aren't you freaking out about having another mouth to feed? This is almost word for word what came out of a friend's mouth two weeks ago after finding out we are expecting. And the answer is, not in the least! We are excited. We consider having children to be on of God's greatest blessings. No, it wasn't super unexpected- we were not trying, but not preventing. Just letting God be in control and trusting. Yes, we know how this happened- apparently we are pretty good at it. And no, I am not getting a job again. We had a pretty firm "It's time for you to stay home, Jay," coming from both of us, and we have made it the last year on one salary just fine. There isn't really any excess, but we are having our needs met and that's all that matters. I don't want to worry about feeding teenagers; I just want to take one day at a time. I breastfeed, so there is no formula to pay for, and we use cloth diapers, which are for the most part completely paid for, and I will use them on our next child. So there really isn't a whole lot of expenses adding up.
Wait, you're planning on nursing? And you're still nursing this one? What?! Yes, and yes. Other than the first few hellish weeks, it gets a LOT better and for me, is way easier. I also know exactly what my child is taking in- the absolute best. With our firstborn, Micah, I only lasted 8 weeks and then he was weaned for a number of reasons, but this time around we are going strong and Levi is 15 months. I don't anticipate any problems. Levi has cut way back on the amount he nurses, and if he decides to completely wean during pregnancy, I won't be heart broken about it. If he does continue, I don't have any problem with tandem nursing. God gave you two boobs, it's not the end of the world :) Besides, the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends at least 2 years, and after that as long as both baby and mother are content.
Are you finding out what you're having? Absolutely. I could have a surprise if we already had a girl and had stuff on hand for both, but at this point in my life, I feel like I just want to be as prepared as possible.
Wow...maternity clothes already...Unfortunately, yes. Your body's ligaments and core muscles are already stretched from the first time around, so you show much earlier with each consecutive pregnancy. Micah's baby bump required maternity jeans around 18 weeks. Levi's needed little more give around 12 weeks. And this time, after 8 weeks I said heck with it. The rubber band trick just isn't cutting it! I haven't gained any weight- in fact, I lost a little, and am still down about 6ish pounds, but just can't fit the jeans from the belly pouch. And I am a belly sleeper! It's starting to get uncomfortable to sleep, so bring on the pillows.
Are you having a shower? A few people have asked me about this, and to be honest, I have no idea. I was always told it was tacky or made you look desperate having a shower after your first baby. That you knew what you were getting into getting pregnant, and you should have looked at your expenses. But on the other hand, I have had LOTS of friends that have had showers with even 4+ kids. We'll see. If you really want to get us something, I wouldn't turn you down, hah! There are a few things that we will need, but no hugely necessary items right now. Cloth diapering stuff/gift cards to my cloth diaper retailer would be great. Also, we are going to be in need of a new vehicle that can actually fit 2 car seats and a booster, since our current vehicle won't. (I don't expect any one to donate for us getting a vehicle any more than I expect money to fall from the sky into my hand.) And if it's a girl, than of course frilly cute clothes. But for now, I can't tell you if there is going to be anything official or not.
You're....HOMEBIRTH planning? Isn't that dangerous/messy/totally hippy earth mother stuff? Yes, we are planning a home birth with an amazing CNM/ARNP who has almost as many years experience as I have been around. She worked in the military as well as hospitals for many years before becoming tired of the system running over a woman's ability to naturally birth, and did the smart thing and got out. I am a low risk patient- I have had 2 pretty uneventful pregnancies, and pretty uneventful deliveries. I understand there is no pain medicine at home. I didn't have an epidural with either birth, and if I am able to move and be in the bath or shower, if will help the pain greatly. It is perfectly safe; the midwife brings everything short of surgery to the house. And if something happens, I am about 15 minutes to the nearest hospital. It would take that long being in hospital to get an OR prepped if an emergency arose, so I am not too concerned. Another aspect of being prepared for a home birth is that you have extremely thorough prenatal care- much more than the 5 minutes an MD would give you at almost any OBGYN office in the country. Emphasis is placed on healthy lifestyle for mom to produce a healthy baby and an uneventful delivery. Please, if you are concerned, ask me about it, but if you want to bash my husband and I's decision before knowing fully why we are choosing the route we are, keep it to your self. No, I don't plan on eating my placenta for now, I am not a hippy, I don't consider it dangerous with the proper precautions taken, and it's not that messy. Everything is clean before the midwife leaves.
How in the world are you and Jose handling everything? Truth is, we take it one day at a time. It's the only way to handle it- if I look at the big picture, it's all a crazy, messy blur that I can't make out. We are, however, carving out a significant chunk of alone time for the first time in almost a year and a half. We have never left Levi for a night, and Micah has spent a night or two away in the last year, so it's seriously time. We are trying to go on a cruise for the first time ever the week after Easter. And if the finances just can't swing it, than we will just try and priceline a hotel and go away for at least a night or two. The last two times we have attempted something like this, things with the kids or work got in the way and we ended up going to the mall one time and Chili's another. WE NEED TO GET OUT! If we don't before the new baby comes, we won't for the next 2 years. I can see it now...deranged, delusional parents walking around like zombies...
Well, that's all the questions people had for me that I can think of. If you think of anything I forgot, let me know and I will see what I can do :)
Wednesday, March 28, 2012
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
We Have An Announcement/ Tenemos Un Anuncio!
We welcome October,
We welcome the fall
Full of orange pumpkins,
Red leaves, and football
It's harvest time,
The farmers will sow
All of the seeds
They worked to grow
But wouldn't you know
A special seed got planted
That takes 9 months
For a wish to be granted
A baby is coming
During harvest will arrive
Our family is growing
From four to five!
Invitamos a octubre
Invitamos al otoño
Lleno de calabaza
Hojas rojas y rastrillando
Es el momento de la cosecha
A sembrar la semilla
A beber la sidra y tener un fuego
Cuando el aire se enfria
Pero ¿sabes qué?
Una semilla se plantó
Que en nueve meses
Va a estar en nuestros manos
Un bebe ya viene
Va llegar en otoño
Nuestra familia esta creciendo
Desde cuatro a cinco!
 | |||
| We told our families by making seed packets with the poems printed on the backs. |
Another little pumpkin is being added to our patch come this fall.
We are so excited and truly blessed to be adding to our family.
Pray with us for a healthy and uneventful pregnancy, for God's provision,
and for the craziness in our house to be orderly!
We are so excited and truly blessed to be adding to our family.
Pray with us for a healthy and uneventful pregnancy, for God's provision,
and for the craziness in our house to be orderly!
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Ten Years and Two Missing Kids
Ten years ago yesterday, my future husband passed me a note in our high school library. We had been talking for about a month, and our friends were desperately trying to set us up. And come to think about it, he didn't really pass me a note. I was sitting at a table with my friends, he walked up and handed it to me (folded all cute, oragami style of course), said nothing, and walked away.
It was the basic, high school style note from a guy putting out feelers and trying to figure out if you felt similar before he took the plunge and actually "asked you out." Like a test drive, if you will. But on the back was a question with two boxes:
And here we are, ten years later. Seven years of marriage under our belt. Two kids. Four addresses since we got married. Three surgeries (one for me, two for Jose). Weddings. Funerals. Picnics. Pets. Fights. Makeups. Valleys, hills, mountain tops, rocky ground, high roads, and everything in between.
We decided that we deserved a grown up night out by ourselves after all this time. Originally we wanted to go away for a night, but it just wasn't feasible after paying down our big debts, buying a new bed, and the fact that Levi is still not sleeping through the night consistently. I just couldn't do that to my in laws.
Jose worked the night before, so he slept all day. I didn't get to bed until 1am, the kids got up at 6:30am, and I was exhausted, so I took the kids to Jose's parents to keep them for the afternoon so I could rest a little before we went out to dinner. I was to call her later and let her know if we would pick them up or if she should drop them off at our house later. I left there at 2pm, laid down for an hour, and then met a girl I am mentoring for a little while. I called Jose's mom to check in at 5pm on the way home, and got a weird disconnected sound.
Not thinking anything of it, I continued on home and got Jose up. We didn't end up leaving until close to 6pm to drive towards Outback for dinner. I should have known our night was going up in flames. We were told it was going to be an hour and a half wait despite call ahead, so we left there and went toward Stuart to find a restaurant. Nearing 7pm, we decided to call Jose's parents and check in. No answer from Jose's mom. No answer from Jose's dad. Both numbers say they are disconnected. We try 3 different restaurants. Hour wait. Way too under dressed. Extremely expensive.
By now, I have hardly had any sleep, haven't eaten in 7 hours, can't get a hold of anyone watching our kids, and have had 4 restaurant disasters, so I started to fall apart in the parking lot. Jose could feel it, and was thoroughly agitated at his parents, so we left and headed towards their house to check on the kids. We pulled up to an empty house, lights off, no one home. I am ready to panic at this point. It's 7:30pm, I haven't talked to anyone since 2. Disconnected every time we call. Jose starts to drive to our house in case they are there. On the way, I remember that Micah said something about Chuckie Cheese (another blog for another day- one of my most hated places)- so I call there and they are being paged. No one fits their description.
We pull up to our house at 8pm, and no one is there either. We leave a note on the door: "If you get here, go to your house. CHECK YOUR PHONES, PLEASE." We head back to Jose's parents to wait. He says if they aren't there by 9pm, we are calling the police because we have no idea where our kids are, and can't contact any one. The worst starts running through my mind, especially since my in laws speak pretty broken English. What if there was an accident? They have no phone to call an ambulance...Nine o'clock comes and goes. Jose and I are on our knees in his parent's living room, asking for peace for us and protection for our babies...and protection for Jose's parents, that we don't kill them when they get there.
The truck rolls into the driveway at 9:30, nearly 7 1/2 hours since I kissed my little goblins goodbye and left them in hands that I trust. After all the events, Jose and I were mentally and physically exhausted. We were also enraged at Jose's parents. They forgot to pay their bill and got their phones cut off, and because they didn't think to ever call us and check in, they never checked their phones.
It could have ended so much worse. Every situation running through my mind could have been a reality. We rode home with two gorgeous boys sleeping in their seats, one kid sized and one bite sized, worn out from a date with the greedy, gambling, giant rat. We rode almost silently, hands laced and fingers gripped tight, thanking God that our babies were safe. Hunger paled, exhaustion didn't matter, they were safe.
I have no idea what it would have been like had things ended differently to our night, but I know one thing: we would weather it together, best friends, hand picked for each other by a God who has amazing plans for us. Ten years later, and a million hard moments, we were able to take a stress that could have decimated a couple and push right through.
I love you, Jose, and wouldn't change a moment we have had together. The naysayers came and went saying we were too young to get married, and where are they now? Standing in awe at how strong our love is.
It was the basic, high school style note from a guy putting out feelers and trying to figure out if you felt similar before he took the plunge and actually "asked you out." Like a test drive, if you will. But on the back was a question with two boxes:
Would you go out with me? Check yes or no.I, smiling like a fool because he finally pseudo-worked up the courage to ask me, quickly checked the box yes. I walked across the library where he sat with his group of friends and dropped it on the table, and kept on walking. Later on, he said he was surprised that I checked yes because "it was only a joke, and I had a real plan on how I wanted to ask you to be my girlfriend." I say you don't practice purposing to someone, so it was the real deal.
And here we are, ten years later. Seven years of marriage under our belt. Two kids. Four addresses since we got married. Three surgeries (one for me, two for Jose). Weddings. Funerals. Picnics. Pets. Fights. Makeups. Valleys, hills, mountain tops, rocky ground, high roads, and everything in between.
We decided that we deserved a grown up night out by ourselves after all this time. Originally we wanted to go away for a night, but it just wasn't feasible after paying down our big debts, buying a new bed, and the fact that Levi is still not sleeping through the night consistently. I just couldn't do that to my in laws.
Jose worked the night before, so he slept all day. I didn't get to bed until 1am, the kids got up at 6:30am, and I was exhausted, so I took the kids to Jose's parents to keep them for the afternoon so I could rest a little before we went out to dinner. I was to call her later and let her know if we would pick them up or if she should drop them off at our house later. I left there at 2pm, laid down for an hour, and then met a girl I am mentoring for a little while. I called Jose's mom to check in at 5pm on the way home, and got a weird disconnected sound.
Not thinking anything of it, I continued on home and got Jose up. We didn't end up leaving until close to 6pm to drive towards Outback for dinner. I should have known our night was going up in flames. We were told it was going to be an hour and a half wait despite call ahead, so we left there and went toward Stuart to find a restaurant. Nearing 7pm, we decided to call Jose's parents and check in. No answer from Jose's mom. No answer from Jose's dad. Both numbers say they are disconnected. We try 3 different restaurants. Hour wait. Way too under dressed. Extremely expensive.
By now, I have hardly had any sleep, haven't eaten in 7 hours, can't get a hold of anyone watching our kids, and have had 4 restaurant disasters, so I started to fall apart in the parking lot. Jose could feel it, and was thoroughly agitated at his parents, so we left and headed towards their house to check on the kids. We pulled up to an empty house, lights off, no one home. I am ready to panic at this point. It's 7:30pm, I haven't talked to anyone since 2. Disconnected every time we call. Jose starts to drive to our house in case they are there. On the way, I remember that Micah said something about Chuckie Cheese (another blog for another day- one of my most hated places)- so I call there and they are being paged. No one fits their description.
We pull up to our house at 8pm, and no one is there either. We leave a note on the door: "If you get here, go to your house. CHECK YOUR PHONES, PLEASE." We head back to Jose's parents to wait. He says if they aren't there by 9pm, we are calling the police because we have no idea where our kids are, and can't contact any one. The worst starts running through my mind, especially since my in laws speak pretty broken English. What if there was an accident? They have no phone to call an ambulance...Nine o'clock comes and goes. Jose and I are on our knees in his parent's living room, asking for peace for us and protection for our babies...and protection for Jose's parents, that we don't kill them when they get there.
The truck rolls into the driveway at 9:30, nearly 7 1/2 hours since I kissed my little goblins goodbye and left them in hands that I trust. After all the events, Jose and I were mentally and physically exhausted. We were also enraged at Jose's parents. They forgot to pay their bill and got their phones cut off, and because they didn't think to ever call us and check in, they never checked their phones.
It could have ended so much worse. Every situation running through my mind could have been a reality. We rode home with two gorgeous boys sleeping in their seats, one kid sized and one bite sized, worn out from a date with the greedy, gambling, giant rat. We rode almost silently, hands laced and fingers gripped tight, thanking God that our babies were safe. Hunger paled, exhaustion didn't matter, they were safe.
I have no idea what it would have been like had things ended differently to our night, but I know one thing: we would weather it together, best friends, hand picked for each other by a God who has amazing plans for us. Ten years later, and a million hard moments, we were able to take a stress that could have decimated a couple and push right through.
I love you, Jose, and wouldn't change a moment we have had together. The naysayers came and went saying we were too young to get married, and where are they now? Standing in awe at how strong our love is.
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
Oh, The Little Things
This week has been full of "little things" that have greatly swung our course in one direction or the other.
"Human felicity is produced not as much by great pieces of good fortune that seldom happen as by little advantages that occur every day." - Benjamin Frankin
We are inching towards our "down with the debt" resolution. Our goals at the beginning of the year included no credit card debt, no car debt, and knocking down my student loan by 25%. Yesterday, we paid off our car and one credit card. One hefty card, one pretty slim card, and we are done. As a family, though, we are going to be pulling off some pretty "big ticket" things this year: a trip to Spain for a month, possibly a new vehicle (something that can seat 7, our little Santa Fe is just getting too cramped), and a few other things to be mentioned in future posts.
Jose and I got a new bed. This has been SUCH a long time coming. We joked before that we slept in a hammock because it sagged so much. Flipping your mattress every 5 days because your back needs a break is really just TOO much. So we too a little left over tax return money (thanks, Uncle Sam!) and headed to our favorite home goodsstore, no I say mecca: IKEA. It is our serendipity. We stumbled in with our friends Jess and Tommy on a weekend with friends at their house, and have never been the same. Anywho, we went with a memory foam core mattress. We can trade it for something else in the next 90 days if we don't like it, and it has a 25 year warranty. I don't think you can go wrong there...
Unless you spend $600 over budget and have to take it all back. Every stinkin' time! It's like grocery shopping when you haven't eaten for 4 days and are drooling over every thing you see. We went for a mattress, and ended up getting a new bed (with the under bed slats that are able to customize how firm it feels, don't you know), a mattress cover, a blanket, a duvet cover set, a sheet set, and "OOOOO! Shiny! Let's get two of those"... "Oh wait, I haven't seen these in forever, I HAVE to have them"..."I hate that we don't have any dishes that match. We are down to 5 plates, and Levi broke another cup today. What do you think of these?"
Originally, we thought we were absolutely fine picking up extras. But when we got home, we discovered that two big checks we thought had cleared were actually floating around in bank space somewhere...so that meant loading every single box back into the Santa Fe - actually inside, because it was raining today- loading the kids in, and driving 2 hours to Orlando to take everything back. The boxes were so large on the bed we bought that I was driving, and could not see anything on the right side of the car. Jose joked that we were on that show "Blind Date" from the 90's because we couldn't see each other. In order for me to change lanes, Jose had to verbally guide me and I had to totally trust him because I had no way to look out a window or a mirror other than the windshield. Awesome, but crazy experience.
This week has been one of new discoveries, tears, worries, wondering how we will do it all, how we will make it, good news, bad news, and everything in between.... But I rest in this:
"Human felicity is produced not as much by great pieces of good fortune that seldom happen as by little advantages that occur every day." - Benjamin Frankin
Levi and I have started, very gently, to wean. I made it a year of breastfeeding exclusively and have since introduced cows milk. It was a HUGE milestone for us! I can't imagine any better way to have cemented a bond with my child- his name means "Attached; Joined in Harmony" in Hebrew. I couldn't have picked it better. I don't plan on weaning on any kind of time frame- baby led weaning allows for the child to do it at their own pace, when they are comfortable with it. He is nursing between 4-6 times during the day and 1 time at night, which is a huge improvement from before. We introduced cow's milk, and he loves it! We may keep going for another year, he may be done in 2 weeks, I have no idea- but I know I will let him stop when he is ready.
We are inching towards our "down with the debt" resolution. Our goals at the beginning of the year included no credit card debt, no car debt, and knocking down my student loan by 25%. Yesterday, we paid off our car and one credit card. One hefty card, one pretty slim card, and we are done. As a family, though, we are going to be pulling off some pretty "big ticket" things this year: a trip to Spain for a month, possibly a new vehicle (something that can seat 7, our little Santa Fe is just getting too cramped), and a few other things to be mentioned in future posts.
Jose and I got a new bed. This has been SUCH a long time coming. We joked before that we slept in a hammock because it sagged so much. Flipping your mattress every 5 days because your back needs a break is really just TOO much. So we too a little left over tax return money (thanks, Uncle Sam!) and headed to our favorite home goods
Unless you spend $600 over budget and have to take it all back. Every stinkin' time! It's like grocery shopping when you haven't eaten for 4 days and are drooling over every thing you see. We went for a mattress, and ended up getting a new bed (with the under bed slats that are able to customize how firm it feels, don't you know), a mattress cover, a blanket, a duvet cover set, a sheet set, and "OOOOO! Shiny! Let's get two of those"... "Oh wait, I haven't seen these in forever, I HAVE to have them"..."I hate that we don't have any dishes that match. We are down to 5 plates, and Levi broke another cup today. What do you think of these?"
Originally, we thought we were absolutely fine picking up extras. But when we got home, we discovered that two big checks we thought had cleared were actually floating around in bank space somewhere...so that meant loading every single box back into the Santa Fe - actually inside, because it was raining today- loading the kids in, and driving 2 hours to Orlando to take everything back. The boxes were so large on the bed we bought that I was driving, and could not see anything on the right side of the car. Jose joked that we were on that show "Blind Date" from the 90's because we couldn't see each other. In order for me to change lanes, Jose had to verbally guide me and I had to totally trust him because I had no way to look out a window or a mirror other than the windshield. Awesome, but crazy experience.
This week has been one of new discoveries, tears, worries, wondering how we will do it all, how we will make it, good news, bad news, and everything in between.... But I rest in this:
"If you decide for God, living a life of God-worship, it follows that you don't fuss about what's on the table at mealtimes or whether the clothes in your closet are in fashion. There is far more to your life than the food you put in your stomach, more to your outer appearance than the clothes you hang on your body. Look at the birds, free and unfettered, not tied down to a job description, careless in the care of God. And you count far more to him than birds.
If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers—most of which are never even seen—don't you think he'll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you? What I'm trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God's giving. People who don't know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don't worry about missing out. You'll find all your everyday human concerns will be met.
Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes. "Matthew 6: 25-26, 30-34, The Message
Thursday, February 2, 2012
Breakneck
I am aching for a different pace.
I see other mothers and, at first thought, am slightly jealous. Manicured lawns, no dishes in the sink. Leather couches with not a mark on them. Soft spoken children, never out of line, and never a toy misplaced. Husband always happy, dinner always organic and made from scratch, hair always perfect.
On second thought, I wonder what they are sedating their children with (hah!). Or what fairy takes away their dishes. Or why their children never jump on the couch. Or their beds. Or my bed. Why do they have everything together? How? And work? And clean? And and and?
Then I look at other ways of life. The style that I ache for: simplification. I long for a yard that doesn't need manicured, because it's full of tall grass, wild flowers, and stretches to meet the prairies and the mountains. I yearn for children that are exhausted at the end of the day because they have been in the garden gathering, in the trees climbing, in the barn exploring. I would love to bake bread every day, spend all day in an apron, and have kids that don't know what TV is. Or why there was a car bomb in another country. Or think that we can only buy Colgate because it "makes our smiles sexy." (Yes, my 5 year old said that.)
Someday, when we are older and more financially able to, I think we will be inching our way out of the surburban life style.
I just can't help but think that as a society, we are missing out on the pleasures of life. To me, those things are primarily to love the Lord and know Him personally...to be best friends with your mate...to raise your darlings up the best way you know how...to enjoy creation...and not let the world whiz by you at light speed.
For now I am stuck being half way crunchy: breastfeeding, cloth diapering, composting for the garden we don't have, and giving our kids a great but non traditional education. I am giving up trying to pretend that I can get it all done. If you come to my house, prepare your self for crayons everywhere, sticky floors, sticky faces, sticky hands, dirty dishes, laundry on the couch, and kids that will melt your heart.
It's just not worth working at breakneck speed to me.
On second thought, I wonder what they are sedating their children with (hah!). Or what fairy takes away their dishes. Or why their children never jump on the couch. Or their beds. Or my bed. Why do they have everything together? How? And work? And clean? And and and?
Then I look at other ways of life. The style that I ache for: simplification. I long for a yard that doesn't need manicured, because it's full of tall grass, wild flowers, and stretches to meet the prairies and the mountains. I yearn for children that are exhausted at the end of the day because they have been in the garden gathering, in the trees climbing, in the barn exploring. I would love to bake bread every day, spend all day in an apron, and have kids that don't know what TV is. Or why there was a car bomb in another country. Or think that we can only buy Colgate because it "makes our smiles sexy." (Yes, my 5 year old said that.)
I just can't help but think that as a society, we are missing out on the pleasures of life. To me, those things are primarily to love the Lord and know Him personally...to be best friends with your mate...to raise your darlings up the best way you know how...to enjoy creation...and not let the world whiz by you at light speed.
For now I am stuck being half way crunchy: breastfeeding, cloth diapering, composting for the garden we don't have, and giving our kids a great but non traditional education. I am giving up trying to pretend that I can get it all done. If you come to my house, prepare your self for crayons everywhere, sticky floors, sticky faces, sticky hands, dirty dishes, laundry on the couch, and kids that will melt your heart.
It's just not worth working at breakneck speed to me.
Monday, September 19, 2011
Smashing Success
Tonight, I write about a subject that is natural. Beautiful. Moving. Nurturing.
Yet to some, what I write about tonight is argued as risque, taboo, to be kept behind the nursery door.
BREASTFEEDING. NURSING. NUM NUMS. MILKY TIME.
GIVING YOUR BABY, AND YOUR SELF, THE ABSOLUTE BEST WITH OUT SHAME.
There, I said it. And if it freaks you out or makes you squeamish, than this post is probably not for you. But if you were one of those who wants to know how things are going, read on. :)
Tonight, I write about what so many of my friends and family have asked about, skirted around, been curious about, or been snide about over the last few months. Are you still nursing? Why? How is it going? Is it hard? Does it hurt? Let's get it out in the open- because it's awesome!
I had every intention of nursing my first son, Micah, four years prior to our newest addition. I was working 25 hours a week, taking 5 classes a semester, trying to be superwoman and my body just did not cooperate. I gave in to so many "booby traps" (pun intended) that sabotaged me. From the git-go, Micah had a horribly recessed jaw and I was a little, er, misshapen, so he was physically unable to latch. No lactation consultant saw me for almost 24 hours, and the nurses were no help. Micah had to end up using a nipple shield to nurse, which was humiliating. Then, I decided to follow BabyWise, a method of scheduling when to breastfeed your baby, instead of feeding on cue. I got a mediocre breast pump that could in NO way maintain my supply. I introduced formula in the beginning- one bottle a night, before bed- because I thought it would help him sleep through the night, and Jose could be involved. I went back to work when he was 4 weeks old, and back to school when he was 8 weeks old. I had to pump in the car or in the college's bathroom. So many things added up to me abandoning breastfeeding when Micah was 9 weeks old, my milk supply was nil, and I was an emotional wreck. I felt like a failure as a woman- unable to do what women for centuries have done for their children. I sabotaged myself by being misinformed, having no support base, and not asking for help in the beginning when I had the chance.
When I became pregnant this time around, I knew from day one that I was breastfeeding, and conquering this skeleton in my closet. I had unfinished boob business. I wanted the absolute best for my baby, and for myself. I read through a book that I strongly urge any mom wanting to breastfeed to read:
I talked to my husband about my goals, and he was amazingly supportive. He understood that this was something that so affected me after our first son was born, and the fact that he was on board really cemented my decision to breastfeed this time around, no matter what obstacles came my way.
Many women take a laissez-faire approach to deciding if they want to nurse. "I'll try it"can easily turn into "I'll try it in the hospital, but I don't care if someone gives the baby a bottle, and when I see that it's hard at first, I am bailing." Breastfeeding, if you want to be successful, is a decision that needs good support, educated parents (NOT just moms) and sound resources.
I was armed with my supportive husband, my informative booby bible, and my research, but there is one more thing that I brought in to play, that was the game-changer: prayer. I am a firm believer that God delights in us even when we come to Him with the tiniest things-things we don't think He could possibly have time to care about. But I know that if we don't ask, we don't receive (Matthew 21:21-23) and that God knows the most intimate desires of my heart (Psalm 37:4). So I without inhibition laid it at God's feet and asked that He make it possible. After praying about it, I came up with my goals, based on the American Academy of Pediatrics and the World Health Organization recommendations: six months of exclusive breastfeeding (no other liquids or foods), and continued breastfeeding through the first year after introducing foods as being a main source of nourishment. After that, to continue breastfeeding as long as baby and I are still content with it.
Levi was born on January 28th at 0158 that morning. Levi latched and successfully nurse for more than 40 minutes within an hour after birth- the "magic hour" (Babies nursed within an hour after birth recieve so many benefits, and it solidifies baby and mom's decision to breastfeed.) No shield, no nurses helping, nothing but mom, dad, and baby working as a team. Nothing short of a miracle!
In the beginning, it was definitely difficult. I nursed on demand, or "cue feeding", whenever Levi was hungry in order to build my milk supply. I had to make it through having a crack for close to two weeks- one of the worst pains in my entire life, and I can handle pain. Pshhh, I had two kids with no epidurals. I had to be meticulous about my nutrition and vitamin intake in the beginning. I have hypocalcemia, so it's already hard for by body to make milk, but it's been harder keeping up with a hippo like Levi! I have had to drink like a camel. I take a lot of herbal supplements to maintain my supply that are in tinctures (highly concentrated in alcohol), and burn like the dickens but work like nothing else has. And perhaps the most uncomfortable for some, we room-shared with Levi for the first 5 months until he was sleeping through the night consistently. For me, it was awesome and all worth it. I am so giddy and gracious about being able to do it that I have an album of nursing pics on my computer to remember it by :)
We made it to our first goal of six months exclusive breastfeeding on July 28, 2011. Levi is now almost 8 months old and we are going strong. He nurse about 7 times a day, and is sleeping through the night pretty regularly. He goes to bed at 8:30 when Micah does, fills up his tank about 11ish before I settle down for bed, and sleeps until about 6:30-7. PLENTY of sleep, compared to what I was getting a few months ago. He also takes 2 naps a day, each about 1-2 hours or longer.
One of the greatest things for me, that I did not expect, was how much of a bond it has created with Levi. I am obviously bonded with my first son, Micah, but having to give up nursing and go back to work and school when he was so young definitely affected how attached he was to me in the beginning. This time around, nursing has become a time that Levi and I so enjoy. He is so in love with his mommy, and I am amazed at the difference between our early relationship and Micah's. It was not one of the reasons I was driven to wanting to breastfeed, but is one of the most amazing benefits.
I have also had the privilege of becoming quite the lactivist. Since successfully nursing, I have had the honor of helping two close friends with problems early on in nursing. I am thinking of becoming a lactation consultant (IBCLC) and continuing to advance breastfeeding awareness in our community. The more society is made aware of benefits, the less of a stigma nursing moms face, and the better care our babes get!
That's the long version. The short is, I love it, and if you want to nurse, get educated and have lots of support. Don't give up, because it's not always easy, and if you can make it through the first 4 weeks, you will be golden. Yes, it will hurt in the beginning, but it doesn't after a little while. No getting up to make bottles, no extra dishes, no gross smelling formula spit up or gross smelling poo (breastmilk poo has almost no smell to it). You never have to check the temperature, and you can do it lying down in bed and snuggle after. So perfect, even Jesus did it (ha!).
Now, off to my nursling. He has one last stop on the milk train before the clock strikes midnight. Ciao to you and chow for him!
Yet to some, what I write about tonight is argued as risque, taboo, to be kept behind the nursery door.
BREASTFEEDING. NURSING. NUM NUMS. MILKY TIME.
GIVING YOUR BABY, AND YOUR SELF, THE ABSOLUTE BEST WITH OUT SHAME.
There, I said it. And if it freaks you out or makes you squeamish, than this post is probably not for you. But if you were one of those who wants to know how things are going, read on. :)
Tonight, I write about what so many of my friends and family have asked about, skirted around, been curious about, or been snide about over the last few months. Are you still nursing? Why? How is it going? Is it hard? Does it hurt? Let's get it out in the open- because it's awesome!
I had every intention of nursing my first son, Micah, four years prior to our newest addition. I was working 25 hours a week, taking 5 classes a semester, trying to be superwoman and my body just did not cooperate. I gave in to so many "booby traps" (pun intended) that sabotaged me. From the git-go, Micah had a horribly recessed jaw and I was a little, er, misshapen, so he was physically unable to latch. No lactation consultant saw me for almost 24 hours, and the nurses were no help. Micah had to end up using a nipple shield to nurse, which was humiliating. Then, I decided to follow BabyWise, a method of scheduling when to breastfeed your baby, instead of feeding on cue. I got a mediocre breast pump that could in NO way maintain my supply. I introduced formula in the beginning- one bottle a night, before bed- because I thought it would help him sleep through the night, and Jose could be involved. I went back to work when he was 4 weeks old, and back to school when he was 8 weeks old. I had to pump in the car or in the college's bathroom. So many things added up to me abandoning breastfeeding when Micah was 9 weeks old, my milk supply was nil, and I was an emotional wreck. I felt like a failure as a woman- unable to do what women for centuries have done for their children. I sabotaged myself by being misinformed, having no support base, and not asking for help in the beginning when I had the chance.
When I became pregnant this time around, I knew from day one that I was breastfeeding, and conquering this skeleton in my closet. I had unfinished boob business. I wanted the absolute best for my baby, and for myself. I read through a book that I strongly urge any mom wanting to breastfeed to read:
I talked to my husband about my goals, and he was amazingly supportive. He understood that this was something that so affected me after our first son was born, and the fact that he was on board really cemented my decision to breastfeed this time around, no matter what obstacles came my way.
Many women take a laissez-faire approach to deciding if they want to nurse. "I'll try it"can easily turn into "I'll try it in the hospital, but I don't care if someone gives the baby a bottle, and when I see that it's hard at first, I am bailing." Breastfeeding, if you want to be successful, is a decision that needs good support, educated parents (NOT just moms) and sound resources.
I was armed with my supportive husband, my informative booby bible, and my research, but there is one more thing that I brought in to play, that was the game-changer: prayer. I am a firm believer that God delights in us even when we come to Him with the tiniest things-things we don't think He could possibly have time to care about. But I know that if we don't ask, we don't receive (Matthew 21:21-23) and that God knows the most intimate desires of my heart (Psalm 37:4). So I without inhibition laid it at God's feet and asked that He make it possible. After praying about it, I came up with my goals, based on the American Academy of Pediatrics and the World Health Organization recommendations: six months of exclusive breastfeeding (no other liquids or foods), and continued breastfeeding through the first year after introducing foods as being a main source of nourishment. After that, to continue breastfeeding as long as baby and I are still content with it.
Levi was born on January 28th at 0158 that morning. Levi latched and successfully nurse for more than 40 minutes within an hour after birth- the "magic hour" (Babies nursed within an hour after birth recieve so many benefits, and it solidifies baby and mom's decision to breastfeed.) No shield, no nurses helping, nothing but mom, dad, and baby working as a team. Nothing short of a miracle!
In the beginning, it was definitely difficult. I nursed on demand, or "cue feeding", whenever Levi was hungry in order to build my milk supply. I had to make it through having a crack for close to two weeks- one of the worst pains in my entire life, and I can handle pain. Pshhh, I had two kids with no epidurals. I had to be meticulous about my nutrition and vitamin intake in the beginning. I have hypocalcemia, so it's already hard for by body to make milk, but it's been harder keeping up with a hippo like Levi! I have had to drink like a camel. I take a lot of herbal supplements to maintain my supply that are in tinctures (highly concentrated in alcohol), and burn like the dickens but work like nothing else has. And perhaps the most uncomfortable for some, we room-shared with Levi for the first 5 months until he was sleeping through the night consistently. For me, it was awesome and all worth it. I am so giddy and gracious about being able to do it that I have an album of nursing pics on my computer to remember it by :)
We made it to our first goal of six months exclusive breastfeeding on July 28, 2011. Levi is now almost 8 months old and we are going strong. He nurse about 7 times a day, and is sleeping through the night pretty regularly. He goes to bed at 8:30 when Micah does, fills up his tank about 11ish before I settle down for bed, and sleeps until about 6:30-7. PLENTY of sleep, compared to what I was getting a few months ago. He also takes 2 naps a day, each about 1-2 hours or longer.
One of the greatest things for me, that I did not expect, was how much of a bond it has created with Levi. I am obviously bonded with my first son, Micah, but having to give up nursing and go back to work and school when he was so young definitely affected how attached he was to me in the beginning. This time around, nursing has become a time that Levi and I so enjoy. He is so in love with his mommy, and I am amazed at the difference between our early relationship and Micah's. It was not one of the reasons I was driven to wanting to breastfeed, but is one of the most amazing benefits.
I have also had the privilege of becoming quite the lactivist. Since successfully nursing, I have had the honor of helping two close friends with problems early on in nursing. I am thinking of becoming a lactation consultant (IBCLC) and continuing to advance breastfeeding awareness in our community. The more society is made aware of benefits, the less of a stigma nursing moms face, and the better care our babes get!
That's the long version. The short is, I love it, and if you want to nurse, get educated and have lots of support. Don't give up, because it's not always easy, and if you can make it through the first 4 weeks, you will be golden. Yes, it will hurt in the beginning, but it doesn't after a little while. No getting up to make bottles, no extra dishes, no gross smelling formula spit up or gross smelling poo (breastmilk poo has almost no smell to it). You never have to check the temperature, and you can do it lying down in bed and snuggle after. So perfect, even Jesus did it (ha!).
Now, off to my nursling. He has one last stop on the milk train before the clock strikes midnight. Ciao to you and chow for him!
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Tidbits
There have been many a change in the Molinuevo household over the last two weeks since I blogged; hence, there have been no posts! Here are a few tidbits to get you through until I get to the nitty gritty later in the week.
Micah started kindergarten. This was a major leap of faith on our part as parents. Micah does not turn 5 until December, and we had him signed up for VPK this fall. However, we looked at the curriculum and Micah already knew it, in its entirety, for the entire year. I know my child, and if he is not being challenged, he acts out. We decided to start him privately with a good friend of the family who does homeschool-tutoring in a group atmosphere- almost like a schoolhouse setting from way back when. While Micah seems to be doing well (he memorizes everything, spits out his vowels and consonants, Bible verses, and so on, it is raising new battles in the parenting arena. My child is a very social child, who loves to be with other kids, and apparently thinks that is the only reason for school. So while the other children are busy doing there seat work like good little children do, my child is dawdling through everything. One coloring sheet took him 25 minutes, and he had to take it outside and finish while everyone else had recess. You would have thought the world was ending. He just cannot seem to make him self concentrate on the task at hand. And it's carrying over into everything at home. An hour to eat dinner. Brushing his teeth is suddenly a daunting task. He can't seem to get motivated to do anything, because he cannot focus. To write his name 6 times took him almost an hour, because he writes it once...and looks at his pencil...and looks at the dog...and then the ceiling...and asks me a question...and... and... and... He says he gets to distracted with the other students and wanting to play. "All I can think about is playing, Mom." He knows everything they are doing so far. It's not that it's too hard, it's that he just doesn't want to. Oi vey, it's going to be a long year. I know we were doing the right thing by challenging him intellectually, and getting him socialized with other kids, but it's just going to be a lot of dragging of feet along the way.
Jose has started working as a charge nurse. This has been scary but exciting for him. He has been a nurse at LRMC for a little over a year, and was injured by a patient back in March, so he has been on light duty and hasn't been allowed to do regular RN duties since because he had to have surgery. Surgery was August 8th, and since then he has been charge nurse a few times, but it's becoming more and more frequent. He said a few months ago he wanted to see how far he can go, and now it's time!
Levi is hitting milestones. He is doing a modified crawl like an inchworm: stretch out, get on all fours, stretch out, get on all fours. He is starting to pull up on things on a regular basis. He pulled up on Micah's school desk leg, slipped, and bashed his head into it. Poor baby! He is also eating like a champ. We are doing Baby Led Weaning (BLW)- very common with breastfed babies. It really is amazing. He is 7 1/2 months old, and eating whole steamed veggies, cheerios, maria cookies, cut up fruits, avocados, whole beans, pancakes, small pieces of chicken or fish...all with NO TEETH. He has completely bypassed purees and cereals (which for the most part, have NO nutritional value). BLW allows for parents to be responsible for providing nutritious food for the baby to eat, and allows the baby to be independent in deciding how much to eat and independent in feeding themselves. Levi hates utensils, and for the most part, we don't push it. He eats with his hands until his belly is full, eats what he likes, and meal times are enjoyable- not a fight to get a spoon in a baby's mouth. Breastfed babies use different muscles in their jaw to nurse than a bottle fed baby does. It is easier for them to learn to mash with their jaws and eat whole foods than purees; whereas the opposite is true for bottle fed babies. The have to learn to use their jaws to chew since bottle feeding is no real work; they do better with purees at first. The whole process is truly amazing. I highly recommend learning more here at the BLW website.
Micah told one of his first public, real lies. And boy, was I livid. I had been up SUPER early with Levi, about 5, to nurse/let the dog out. He fell back asleep as the sun was rising, and Jose knew I was really tired, so he was kind enough to let me sleep in a while and offered to take Micah to school. Levi slept until 8:15, shortly after Jose left with Micah for school, and we got up and got the day started. I was so grateful...until I picked Micah up from school. I arrived, Micah said hi, and another student promptly asked me what time I get up in the morning. Not thinking anything of it, I answered "usually before 7, why?" I was then told by 3 students that "Micah said all you do is sleep all day." Oh really... Is that what he said... Later in the car, I confronted him about it. He said that he knew I didn't sleep all day, he didn't know why he said it, and on and on as kids do. The next morning, he told his teacher and classmates the truth and all was fine. A little sliver of me wishes there was a shred of truth to that. One day to sleep, ALL DAY, would be amazing. But who would cook? clean? take care of Levi? be home work help? take the dog out?..... in my dreams.
As you can see, life is busy. A few friends of mine have asked me how the cloth diapering and breastfeeding are going, if I am still doing it, etc, and there will be a long and short answer. The short: Yes, still doing both! Yes, still loving both! I will do a post dedicated to each later in the week.
And now, for a hot bath and sleep. My pillow calls...
Micah started kindergarten. This was a major leap of faith on our part as parents. Micah does not turn 5 until December, and we had him signed up for VPK this fall. However, we looked at the curriculum and Micah already knew it, in its entirety, for the entire year. I know my child, and if he is not being challenged, he acts out. We decided to start him privately with a good friend of the family who does homeschool-tutoring in a group atmosphere- almost like a schoolhouse setting from way back when. While Micah seems to be doing well (he memorizes everything, spits out his vowels and consonants, Bible verses, and so on, it is raising new battles in the parenting arena. My child is a very social child, who loves to be with other kids, and apparently thinks that is the only reason for school. So while the other children are busy doing there seat work like good little children do, my child is dawdling through everything. One coloring sheet took him 25 minutes, and he had to take it outside and finish while everyone else had recess. You would have thought the world was ending. He just cannot seem to make him self concentrate on the task at hand. And it's carrying over into everything at home. An hour to eat dinner. Brushing his teeth is suddenly a daunting task. He can't seem to get motivated to do anything, because he cannot focus. To write his name 6 times took him almost an hour, because he writes it once...and looks at his pencil...and looks at the dog...and then the ceiling...and asks me a question...and... and... and... He says he gets to distracted with the other students and wanting to play. "All I can think about is playing, Mom." He knows everything they are doing so far. It's not that it's too hard, it's that he just doesn't want to. Oi vey, it's going to be a long year. I know we were doing the right thing by challenging him intellectually, and getting him socialized with other kids, but it's just going to be a lot of dragging of feet along the way.
Jose has started working as a charge nurse. This has been scary but exciting for him. He has been a nurse at LRMC for a little over a year, and was injured by a patient back in March, so he has been on light duty and hasn't been allowed to do regular RN duties since because he had to have surgery. Surgery was August 8th, and since then he has been charge nurse a few times, but it's becoming more and more frequent. He said a few months ago he wanted to see how far he can go, and now it's time!
Levi is hitting milestones. He is doing a modified crawl like an inchworm: stretch out, get on all fours, stretch out, get on all fours. He is starting to pull up on things on a regular basis. He pulled up on Micah's school desk leg, slipped, and bashed his head into it. Poor baby! He is also eating like a champ. We are doing Baby Led Weaning (BLW)- very common with breastfed babies. It really is amazing. He is 7 1/2 months old, and eating whole steamed veggies, cheerios, maria cookies, cut up fruits, avocados, whole beans, pancakes, small pieces of chicken or fish...all with NO TEETH. He has completely bypassed purees and cereals (which for the most part, have NO nutritional value). BLW allows for parents to be responsible for providing nutritious food for the baby to eat, and allows the baby to be independent in deciding how much to eat and independent in feeding themselves. Levi hates utensils, and for the most part, we don't push it. He eats with his hands until his belly is full, eats what he likes, and meal times are enjoyable- not a fight to get a spoon in a baby's mouth. Breastfed babies use different muscles in their jaw to nurse than a bottle fed baby does. It is easier for them to learn to mash with their jaws and eat whole foods than purees; whereas the opposite is true for bottle fed babies. The have to learn to use their jaws to chew since bottle feeding is no real work; they do better with purees at first. The whole process is truly amazing. I highly recommend learning more here at the BLW website.
Micah told one of his first public, real lies. And boy, was I livid. I had been up SUPER early with Levi, about 5, to nurse/let the dog out. He fell back asleep as the sun was rising, and Jose knew I was really tired, so he was kind enough to let me sleep in a while and offered to take Micah to school. Levi slept until 8:15, shortly after Jose left with Micah for school, and we got up and got the day started. I was so grateful...until I picked Micah up from school. I arrived, Micah said hi, and another student promptly asked me what time I get up in the morning. Not thinking anything of it, I answered "usually before 7, why?" I was then told by 3 students that "Micah said all you do is sleep all day." Oh really... Is that what he said... Later in the car, I confronted him about it. He said that he knew I didn't sleep all day, he didn't know why he said it, and on and on as kids do. The next morning, he told his teacher and classmates the truth and all was fine. A little sliver of me wishes there was a shred of truth to that. One day to sleep, ALL DAY, would be amazing. But who would cook? clean? take care of Levi? be home work help? take the dog out?..... in my dreams.
As you can see, life is busy. A few friends of mine have asked me how the cloth diapering and breastfeeding are going, if I am still doing it, etc, and there will be a long and short answer. The short: Yes, still doing both! Yes, still loving both! I will do a post dedicated to each later in the week.
And now, for a hot bath and sleep. My pillow calls...
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